{"id":2897,"date":"2009-06-01T18:30:57","date_gmt":"2009-06-02T02:30:57","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/angrypirate.com\/wordpress\/?p=2897"},"modified":"2009-06-01T18:30:57","modified_gmt":"2009-06-02T02:30:57","slug":"doggy-chronicles-destructo-dog","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/doggy-chronicles-destructo-dog\/","title":{"rendered":"Doggy Chronicles: Destructo Dog"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"chew<\/a>
\nMississippi was just barking up a storm in the living room. She was nowhere near the door, she was in the middle of the living room, barking for my attention. We had just gotten back from a solid hour and a half at the dog park and you’d think she’d be ready for a nap. She’s a little hopped up on goofy juice right now so I’m not letting her out in the backyard right now. She started barking up a storm at the park after getting mad at a remote controlled hobby glider. Once she starts barking, it’s pretty much down hill from there.<\/p>\n

So anyway, I found her barking up a storm in the middle of the living room with a pair of my underwear in her mouth. She wouldn’t give them back. I had to use the “voice of god” (VOG) on her to get her to drop them. They were torn to shreds before I got to them. I’m also pretty sure she somehow got ahold of an unused tampon today because I found the wrapper earlier but no torn up pieces of cotton to be found anywhere. She’s been gagging a little today. I hear cotton can give you, well… cotton mouth. We keep all that stuff, including all trash and recycling safely stowed away in the cupboards, but she must have grabbed a stray off the edge of my desk or something.<\/p>\n

I’ve started wedging my workout shoes into the top of my elliptical machine so she can’t get to them. She tried to steal a sock earlier. If you look around our house you will find it pretty much devoid of anything non dog friendly from the waste down. Our dining room table looks like a cubby hole blew up. Our kitchen counters have keys, mail, remotes, sunglasses, purses and bags. We keep a cardboard box and an ottoman on the couch most of the time so she stays off it.<\/p>\n

Whenever she is frustrated, she finds something of ours and seeks to destroy it. Quite often I’m retrieving one of Tom’s shoes from her mouth. I am constantly picking up shoes that were accidentally left out and throwing them in the closet. It’s starting to look like a shoe avalanche in there.<\/p>\n

We try to keep the bedroom door closed. We try to get ahold of the mail before she does. I try to keep things off the floor in my office (you should see my desktop). You never know when or where she’s going to strike. Things had gotten a little lax around here because she was behaving so much better, but it seems the destructo behavior is back in style.<\/p>\n

We are pretty sure she swallowed something unpleasant to pass the other day and that was why she was feeling so bad. I wish there was some way of showing her, gee, when you eat bad things, it hurts on the way out. I don’t think she’s smart enough to make any connections between swallowing and pooping.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Mississippi was just barking up a storm in the living room. She was nowhere near the door, she was in the middle of the living room, barking for my attention. We had just gotten back from a solid hour and a half at the dog park and you’d think she’d be ready for a nap. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2897","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2897","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2897"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2897\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2897"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2897"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2897"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}