I think I earned a new superhero name. It’s either going to be Confusion Girl or Self Inflicted Mind F&%# Girl. I suppose Confusion Girl is catchier sounding. There’s some confusion over my financial aid package and it just sent me spiralling into a world of self doubt and confusion. I’m sure it’s all fine. It was just enough to get my imagination going.<\/p>\n
Internal dialog of confusion girl: “What if I don’t get to enroll this fall? Then I guess I should find a job so I can try to make up some of this money I’m burning through. God, I’m so stressed about money, I don’t want to be a burden. I don’t want to go into debt. Maybe I should give this art school thing up. What a ridiculous goal to have, I’ll never make a living out of it. I’m just wasting my time. Who do I think I am? What the hell am I doing with my life? I should just give up now before I spiral into more debt and more confusion. Art is so confusing. What am I doing? Maybe I should just spend the rest of my life painting nice pictures in my spare time. What are I trying to accomplish? What have I been doing for the last two years. If I stop now, It’ll all be for nothing. I can’t stop. I can’t be a quitter. I’ve gone too far. This is crazy.”<\/p>\n
Then I decided I should probably go home and try not to think about it until I get my fax. Tomorrow I will go to CCA and try to figure out what’s going on. Forward is the only direction I can think about right now. Push, push, push. I just want school to start. I want this thing to start feeling real, because all it feels like right now is a scarey financial burden.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I think I earned a new superhero name. It’s either going to be Confusion Girl or Self Inflicted Mind F&%# Girl. I suppose Confusion Girl is catchier sounding. There’s some confusion over my financial aid package and it just sent me spiralling into a world of self doubt and confusion. I’m sure it’s all fine. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-723","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/723","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=723"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/723\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=723"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=723"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alannarisse.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=723"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}