This post has had a thousand titles in my head: “Taking the leap,” “Not taking the leap,” “We’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take it anymore,” “Defeated,” Baby Steps,” “Jumping off a cliff,” “Sitting down,” “Stepping back,” “Screw you, Universe,” “My Glass has exactly 50% of it’s contents.” Whatever. It’s whatever. That’s what I should call it… Whatever.
I have narrowed down all of my problems into two main categories:
1. I don’t have enough money
2. I’m too fat
When I boiled down my problems into such tiny sentences, they seemed less overwhelming. So yeah. What to do. I could talk in circles about how I started the necklaces because I hoped they’d bring in enough extra cash every month so that I could concentrate on my Art with a capital “A.” And I could talk about how when that didn’t work, I decided to start taking small website projects so I could get some money coming in and be more free to work on my Art with a capital “A.” But as we know, or maybe we don’t know… All the money I made from the last two projects was completely wiped out by Mississippi’s surgery, and then some.
Well that sucks. I feel like I’m trying to run up a landslide. And so, I’m going to sit down. I’m going to stop fighting my way up a hill I’m never going to get on top of. Breath…. breath…. Time to figure things out. The good news is, I have a whole lotta art supplies and a craft show in one month. I have enough for the show now. So, I’m going to focus on making stuff to bring to the show. No expectations on selling anything, because the last few months have proven to me, there’s no money in my necklaces. Nope, I’m just going to go, have a good time, and hang out with other crafty people, hopefully enjoy some sun, enjoy the Corin Tucker Band and Mo Phillips, and just enjoy the day. What a nice sounding goal. So here I go. Gonna make some stuff, at my leisure, with no pressure, and then I’m gonna put it on a table and hang out for the day.
And did you notice how all of my financial goals revolved around trying to find a way to make more time to make Art? Yeah I noticed that too. So maybe money isn’t as much the issue as the lack of time to make Art. Seriously, if I stopped worrying about getting out of debt, I would be sooooooo happy to do nothing all day but glue popsickle sticks together. And you know what? If I did that, I would make the MOST awesome popsickle stick sculpture. Well, except that I don’t have time. Juniper just needs to get old enough to help me with more with projects.
So… the fat part. Well, I’m going to just keep working on that one. I’m working on it. One day I feel desperate, the next day I am, well, not desperate. It would probably be easier to feel desperate all the time, and that would stop me from ordering pulled pork sandwiches, but that also sounds kinda sucky being desperate all the time. so anyway, I’m not going to make any statements or promises I can’t keep. I’m just going to keep trying. Baby steps, one day at a time, and all the other cliche things you can think of to say about this sort of thing.
Juniper just woke up from her nap and is in her crib singing the ABCs to herself. She’s so cool.